Today was my first day of providing full-time childcare for Brooks.
i've watched him occasionally before, but today has been the longest day. Ashley dropped him off bright and early at 6:15. Charlie was awake too - which is rare for her. All of that woke Em up early too. Things were fine until we dropped Emmy off at school. She carried Brooks out to Walter (our new/old HUGE truck) and put him in his carseat behind her while I put Charlie into her carseat behind me.
Once I returned home, however, the madness began. Which child should I leave unaccompanied out in the driveway while I took the other one into the house first? It seemed cruel to abandon Brooks on his first day. But it seemed equally cruel to force poor Charlie to watch me take some other child into her house without her. So I attempted to do both at once.
Once back home, they both needed to eat all the time. Except when they were both pooping all the time. Charlie has never pooped that much. And Ashley swears Brooks only poops about 5 times a week. Well, he's just about finished the week then today. My house looks like a bomb went off. I managed to get in a shower, but was unable to actually dry my hair because Brooks hates loud noises.
I learned that Charlie would prefer a lose/lose scenario to a win/win one:
Charlie has two cookies (one for each hand) and Brooks has two cookies (again, one for each hand) is bad because Brooks has cookies. The fact that Charlie also has cookies is, somehow, irrelevant. She would prefer to have all four cookies. Barring that, then no one should have cookies because, bottom line, BROOKS SHOULD NOT HAVE COOKIES!!!!
They did nap - for about 6 minutes. They both look exhausted now, but I'm forcing them to keep playing because we leave in 30 minutes to go get Em. By the time we're back, Ashley should be here to get Brooks. Then maybe I can get Charlie to take a long nap while I:
pound a fifth of Jack Daniels sit in the corner and eat my own hair attempt to blackmail Emmy into becoming home-schooled
clean up the chaos the two babies created.